No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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