your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize