i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize