I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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