She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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