i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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