You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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