just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
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We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
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My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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