Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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