I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize