The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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