i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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