found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
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Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
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walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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