made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
His nipple licking is glorious
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