Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
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He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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