I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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