8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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