youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize