Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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