Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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