hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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