hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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