She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
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