...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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