Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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