good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize