why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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