omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
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Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
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Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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