i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize