I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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