she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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