Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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