So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize