and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize