i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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