My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
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thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
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I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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