"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize