She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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