i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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