just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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