I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
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