I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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