Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize