Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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