shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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