I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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