he wants to bone in the snuggie
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
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btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
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I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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