I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize