you have to choose: penises or morals?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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