You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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